Sharing the hard moments, because they need to be shared too
It was a conversation with a friend that inspired me to put my thoughts into words and share them here for my very first post in the ‘The Hard Days’ section. Because these moments of parenting neurodivergent kids just as important to talk about. They matter because they remind us of our strength, resilience, and the unwavering love [and caffeine] that keeps us parents going.
Hey there, Perfection Mama community,
Let’s talk about the tough moments, shall we? First and foremost, I’m talking about the moments we most avoid [or at least this mama tends to]. The ones that test our patience, challenge our resilience, and even sometimes bring us to tears. The ones that you most likely need to hear to know that you’re not alone if, like me, you’re parenting neurodivergent kids. This week, we’ve had our fair share of challenges.
In particular, one incident stands out: when my son jumped on top of a family member so hard that the momentum made him fly off the other side of the (fortunately short) couch. He was simply over-excited, “crashing” and playing for sensory input, and unaware of both his + gravity’s strength. As a parent of a neurodivergent kid, you know firsthand the unique complexities of our neurodivergent days. You are not alone, and also, in similar situations, I hope you found your kiddo unscathed [Finnley was scared but not hurt] and those closest to you are as understanding as those around me were. Seriously, who you surround yourself with matters most. She was so quick to understand and support my son, and us.
Because it’s not just the challenges that define our journey; moreover, it’s the beautiful, unexpected moments that get us through the more difficult ones. This morning, as I groggily responded to my son’s cries at 4 a.m., I didn’t know what to expect as it has been one of his rougher weeks so far. Bleary-eyed and tired, I asked him if he was okay. He said yes, but his tear-streaked face told a different story. I asked him if he wanted a kiss, half-expecting him to shy away as he sometimes does. I totally understand the sensory overload he experiences. To my surprise, he grabbed my face and planted the most heartfelt cheek kiss on me. It was a small gesture, but at that moment, it spoke straight to my heart. It was a reminder of the depth of the unconditional love and connection we share, transcending the challenges that often accompany our neurodivergent journey. As I tucked him into bed next to me with the familiar “ch ch ch” he loves to hear, his smile went straight to my heart. Even when he couldn’t go back to sleep. 🙂
I share these stories back-to-back not to lessen or “break up” talking about the hard things, but rather, to emphasize the importance of acknowledging the real moments—the ones that catch you off guard and then the ones that fill your heart with the kind of love you wouldn’t know without that other stuff. In fact, it was a conversation with a friend that inspired me to put my thoughts into words and share them here for my very first post in the ‘The Hard Days’ section. Because these moments of parenting neurodivergent kids just as important to talk about. They matter because they remind us of our strength, resilience, and the unwavering love [and caffeine] that keeps us parents going.
Parenting neurodivergent kids isn’t always easy. There are sleepless nights, endless worries, and moments when you question if you’re doing it right… and moments when you’re sure you’re not. Yet, amid all the challenges, there is so much love there, and the kind of contentment that can only come from truly being there for the good, the hard, the messy, and everything in between. While sleep-deprived, my heart is filled with gratitude and I’m reminded that I’m not alone in this journey. And neither are you. We are a community, a support system, and a source of strength for one another.
So, to all the moms out there navigating the intricate paths of neurodivergent parenting, I want you to know that you are not alone. I’m right here with you, learning and growing every day, just like you. Above all, I want you to remember that you are perfection, as-is. Your love, patience [trust me, you are patient], and unwavering dedication make you an incredible parent, even on the toughest days. Please know you can reach out to me anytime on my contact page.
Sending you so much love,
Megan ✨